


Karkat and Dave Have a Sleepover

by poyitjdr



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Dave and Karkat are huge nerds goodness gracious, M/M, Meteor with Vriska
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-21
Updated: 2015-08-21
Packaged: 2018-04-16 11:06:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,898
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4623030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/poyitjdr/pseuds/poyitjdr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Karkat has never been to a sleepover and Dave plans to fix this. Includes make-overs, pillow fights, and dumb boys being scared to admit their feelings. Also I don't know to title things</p>
            </blockquote>





	Karkat and Dave Have a Sleepover

**Author's Note:**

> I am so sorry for all my errors in this. I just kind of wrote it all at once instead of sleeping. Please let me know if there is anything I can fix immediately! Loosely based on a make-up au thing by nubbybub on tumblr and a reference to a tumblr post that I don't have the link too. This is actually my first fic on here, so feedback is much appreciated! Thank you!!!

“I CAN’T BELIEVE THEY LEFT US ALONE WITH SERKET AND TEREZI!” Karkat’s voice pounded against the crimson walls of Dave’s room. He was currently sitting on the desk with his knees drawn up to his chest and ranting wildly, his hands pulling his thick black hair taut between swift gestures. 

“I gotta agree, that was a pretty shitty thing for them to do. Why did they ditch anyways?” Dave inquired lazily, his voice showing his slight disinterest in the current topic. He was over it for the most part, having spent the time with Terezi and laughing at Vriska and Karkat during their respective rants about the current rom-com. In fact, Dave found he had enjoyed having that moment to bond with the teal blood and naturally, watching his hot-headed best friend get riled up was always fascinatingly hilarious. His face would turn red with his anger and his rough hands would point daggers at his victim and his lips would form a scowl, curling over his amazingly sharp teeth and making him look rather like a put-out puppy. 

“SOMETHING ABOUT A HUMAN SLEEPOVER. LIKE WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU DITCH MOVIE NIGHT FOR SOMETHING AS PATHETIC AS A SLEEPOVER? WHAT THE FUCK EVEN IS A SLEEPOVER?” His shoulders slumped in slight defeat.

“Bro, you don’t know what a sleepover is? Holy shit we are changing this right now.” The albino quickly rose from his bed and grabbed the clawed hand. “Vantas c’mon we are making this happen. The whole shebang. Make-up, pillow fights, and everything. We have to do this right. For irony’s sake.”

“NO! WHY IN THIS SHIT EXCUSE FOR A UNIVERSE WOULD I WANT TO DO THAT?”

“Dude, rom-coms are integral part of chick parties. Complete with popcorn and celebrity gossip. You’ll love it. We’ve gotta alchemize some shit first though.”

“I GUESS IF IT INVOLVES A CINIMATIC MASTERPIECE IT CAN’T BE TOO AWFUL.” Karkat allowed himself a smirk as Strider yanked him to his feet, then not waiting a moment more as he raced to the alchemizer, passing quickly through the gray corridors. Their hands didn’t part until they reached their destination. 

“Fuck. Do you know the code to alchemize make-up?”

“YES STRIDER, IT IS PERMANENTLY INSTILLED INTO MY BRAIN CONSIDERING THE FACT THAT I’VE NEVER FUCKING USED IT. THE CODE IS F-U-C-K-Y-O-U.” He spit his answer out harshly at the taller boy as he prodded him in the chest with each letter. 

“Damn, how will I ever recover from that?” 

“YOU PROBABLY WON’T. YOU’LL NEED LALONDE’S EXPERTISE AND YEARS OF COUNSELING AND STILL YOU’LL FIND THAT YOU CAN’T FORGET THE MOMENT KARKAT VANTAS DESTROYED YOU.” 

“You’re right.” Karkat’s goofy smirk was destroying Dave internally and the human fought off the emotions. It was best-bro time, not sappy oh-my-god I’m so in love with you I can barely function around you time. Total no homo. “There’ll probably be scientists all coming up and asking, ‘Wow, how can such a cool kid be rendered defenseless and be utterly obliterated from one insult?’ And I’ll answer ‘Karkat motherfucking Vantas, that’s how.’ And suddenly they’ll understand and there will be dramatic music as a flashback plays of this moment. It’ll be very touching and the audience will shed a collective ironic tear.”

“DAMN STRAIGHT.” 

“I don’t know Vantas, you seem pretty gay to me sometimes. Like even your luscious locks can’t straighten out.” 

“STRIDER, TROLLS CAN’T BE GAY OR STRAIGHT.”

“So you just find a hot piece of ass and romance it in your quadrants no matter what the gender? I could get behind that, well not really the quadrants deal, but yeah.”

“WEREN’T WE SUPPOSED TO BE MAKING SOMETHING.”

“Girls talk about their feelings at sleepovers too numbnuts. Also yeah. Alchemize us some popcorn. Which movie do you want to watch?”

“HOW ABOUT IN WHICH THE OLIVE BLOOD AND THE FUSCHIA BLOOD MEET WHEN THE OLIVE BLOOD MURDERS THE FUSHIA BLOOD’S LUSUS AND ENTER A KISMESIS AND ARE AUSPISTIZED BY A BLUE BLOOD WHO BEGINS TO FEEL FLUSHED FOR A RUST BLOOD THAT IS MATESPRITS WITH THE OLIVE BLOOD AND THEN THERE IS A BIG FIGHT BETWEEN THE OLIVE AND THE BLUE BLOOD FOR THE RUST BLOOD AND THEY ENTER A KISMESIS AND THE FUSCHIA BLOOD FEELS BETRAYED AND MURDERS ALL OF THEM IN REVENGE AND LEADS THE REST OF THEIR LIFE ALONE?”

“I hate troll movie titles. Like that just spoiled all of it for me.”

“STRIDER, YOU DON’T EVEN LIKE ROM-COMS SO WHY WOULD YOU GIVE TWO SHITS?”

“Well maybe I was actually going to ironically watch this one for the sake of the sleepover so we could gossip about it afterwards and faun ourselves as we think about how attractive the actors are even though they’re way too old and we would never have a chance.”

“FINE. WE’LL WATCH SOMETHING ELSE. I’LL JUST GRAB A MOVIE FROM THE PILE IN THE COMMON’S ROOM AND IT’LL BE A GIANT FUCKING SURPRISE FOR THE BOTH OF US.”  
“Sounds awesome. Okay so you gonna make that popcorn anytime soon?”

“OH EXCUSE ME FOR GETTING SIDETRACKED AND FORGETTING MY LIFE PURPOSE, WHICH IS TO CREATE HORRIFICALLY YELLOW POPPED KERNELS THAT JUST GET STUCK IN YOUR TEETH AFTERWARDS AND ARE A PAIN IN THE ASS.”

“Don’t forget the butter. I’m going to go swipe Kanaya and Rose’s make-up since we lack the expertise in this field. Down go the irony points. I’ll be back in a sec.” Dave turned on his heel and headed towards the girls quarters. He entered the room and found Rose reading a troll book with characters who desperately needed clothing adorning the cover.

“Hello David.” Rose glanced up from her novel, her violet eyes meeting Dave’s shades. “Is there something I can assist you with? Did you find you needed your ecto-biological sister to help you figure out your seemingly complicated feelings for your best friend? My synopsis is this; you are not hetero.”

“Okay let’s pretend you aren’t shipping me with my best bro and get down to the real problem. Where is your make-up at?” Rose quirked an eyebrow and gestured at a makeshift vanity. 

“Are you needing to borrow it for some odd reason?”

“Karkat doesn’t know what a sleepover is. I am teaching him with hands-on experience.”

“Hands-on? Dave, do I even need to say anything? At least be reasonable and use protection. We may be a bunch of hormonal teenagers stuck together on a meteor for three years, but remember to be a gentleman at least.”

“Kanaya! Rose is being gross again! Can you come shut your gal pal up? Also I’m stealing your make-up for the night because fuck you both, you left us with the Scourge Sisters alone. I’m scarred for life here.” Dave hollered, figuring that she would be nearby. Sure enough, as she soon emerged from a closed door and gave Rose a look. The boy grabbed the items from the vanity and wrapped them in his cape before absconding. He did NOT need to be there for the “gal pal” time that he was certain would occur momentarily. Ever. 

He wound his way back through the halls and stopped in the doorway of the commons area, where a glorious glute was sticking into the air as its owner rummaged through a pile of discs. The figure began to stand slowly, stretching as they did so. Their body was all gentle curves hidden under a ridiculous amount of fabric. Dave felt his face redden slightly at the view, but tried to quickly regain his composure as Karkat began to turn.

“Find a suitable flick? Thought we were going full surprise mode. Looks like you spent some time digging around there though. You’re breaking my heart here Vantas. I can’t handle the betrayal.”

“I WAS TRYING TO FIND ONE WE HAVEN’T WATCHED YET. ALSO I’M SURE YOUR BLOOD PUMPER CAN GET OVER IT. DID YOU GET THE MAKE-UP?” They began to walk towards Dave’s room, drifting a couple inches apart.

“Yeah, but I had to deal with Lalonde sticking her nose in my personal life. For some reason a dude just can’t borrow his sister’s make-up without it being weird. I think it should be normal honestly. Maybe I just want to feel more beautiful sometimes. Like maybe I just want to smack on some bright red lipstick and do my murderess walk in my killer heels and slay the world around me with my flawless eyeliner? Probably have a pair of wicked shades- oh wait I do- and enter a courtroom and dramatically swipe them off as I confess to my crimes and I’ll get away with it cause by then my incredible looks will have rendered them all speechless and they’ll just be in awe and I’ll walk out and get a police escort to the White House where they will make me president because wow who would mess with a country where someone so attractive it should be illegal is the face of the nation? For real. And I would-“ The human was stopped as a gray hand covered his mouth. 

“STRIDER. YOU’RE RAMBLING AGAIN. STOP THAT. “ Karkat’s face betrayed his false annoyance and Dave decided to be an ass. He licked the hand that still rested on his face and had to resist bursting with laughter when his friend’s face contorted into that of ultimate disgust. “WHAT THE LITERAL FUCK?”

“I wasn’t done talking. Still had to get to the part where my partner in crime joined me and we ruled the world by making everyone faint because we were just too hot for them. It’d be glorious honestly.” Dave gave a quick smile before adding, “You’d be my partner in crime by the way.”

“OH, AS IF *THAT* WASN’T OBVIOUS SINCE I’M PRACTICALLY THE ONLY PERSON YOU WILL TALK TO FOR LONGER THAN FIVE MINUTES.” He paused for a moment, ‘WAIT, ARE YOU INSINUATING THAT YOU THINK I’M ATTRACTIVE?”

“Oh look here’s the door. Let’s get this party started bro. No time to waste with silly questions.”

“IF WE HAVE ANYTHING, IT’S TIME. ANSWER ME, DAVE.”

“Nope. C’mon we gotta get his show on the road.” Dave was desperately trying to hide any trace of embarrassment as he grabbed at the door handle to his room before he was blocked by a very short, very stubborn troll.

“BUT I THOUGHT WE WERE SUPPOSED TO TALK ABOUT OUR FEELINGS AT THESE HUMAN SLEEPOVERS, RIGHT DAVE? I’M JUST CURIOUS AS TO WHAT ABOUT ME IS EVEN REMOTELY APPEALING TO ANYONE ELSE. PEOPLE DON’T TEND TO FIND ME ATTRACTIVE SO SORRY IF I’M CONFUSED AND REQUIRE THAT YOU ACTUALLY GIVE A CLEAR ANSWER.”

“Uhm. Well you aren’t… You see… fuck.”

“Strider, I can handle it if you don’t think I am.” He lowered his voice and his eyes stared at the ground. “It’s just… sorry. My shit self-esteem kind of just pissed all over this. Maybe we should do this another time.”

“No, cause I’d have to go back to the lair of Lalonde and I’m not doing that. And yeah maybe I do think you have a nice face and pretty hair and adorable little horns.” ‘And a rockin’ bod’ he added silently. “So what about me? Am I revolting to look at?”

“NOT ESPECIALLY. JUST WHEN YOU’RE BEING AN ASS.” Karkat gave him a once over with his eyes and added “BUT YOU’RE PRETTY MUCH ALWAYS AN ASS, SO.”

“Let’s get inside before you make me cry with your insults. So harsh.” They entered the room and Dave dropped his loot onto his bed. “Hop on up, we’re doing make-overs first. Then we can watch the movie and gossip and have pillow fights and all that glorious shit.”

“HOW THE FUCK DO WE DO THIS? LIKE WHAT DO WE EVEN START WITH? AND WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?”

“I think that’s to curl eyelashes so they make your eyes look more framed and bigger and shit. I’m also pulling all of this information out of my ass so it’s guaranteed to be 100% bullshit.”

“OKAY SO HOW ARE WE DOING THIS?”

“Aight, so I’ll start cause it seems like I know more about this. I had to use foundation and concealer and shit to hide some of my scars when I was younger. Didn’t want everyone to find out how much I got my ass kicked by Bro. I don’t think he did either.”

“THAT IS INCREDIBLY DEPRESSING SO SHUT YOUR LOAD GAPER AND PUT THIS GARBAGE ON MY GLORIOUS FACE ALREADY.” 

“Yeah, sorry. Let’s do this. You want me to explain what I’m doing as I do it or just go for it?”

“I TRUST YOU ENOUGH TO JUST GO FOR IT I GUESS. DON’T FUCK MY FACE UP TOO MUCH.”

“You got it. Ask me if you got a question about anything.”

Dave opened up Kanaya’s gray foundation and began to apply it, holding Karkat’s face in one hand to steady it. He rubbed it in lightly to even it out and paused to check his work. Satisfied, he grabbed the smoky-eye shadow and applied it according to the instructions on the back. It was a little uneven, but he shrugged and began to apply winged eyeliner to the strangely quiet troll. His skin was warm against Dave’s hand and his breathing was strictly controlled as the boy worked. Deciding that Karkat’s eyelashes were perfect as they were and would only be hindered by mascara, he applied a light brush to the cheekbones and the tip of the nose.

“HOW MUCH LONGER IS THIS GOING TO TAKE?”

“Shoosh I’m almost done. What color of lipstick do you want?”

“IS THERE BLACK?”

“Not technically, but I got a substitution for it so we’re good. Gimme a minute and I’ll be done.”

Dave grabbed the eyeliner again and began to apply it to Karkat’s lips. It was soft and rubbed off easily onto his mouth. He pressed lightly and began to lean forward subconsciously, lost in concentration on bringing justice to Karkat’s lips. It was only when his breath had begun to tickle the trolls’ face that Karkat stiffened and opened his eyes to find Dave incredibly close and still focused on his mouth. Karkat’s stomach flipped and his breath hitched slightly at the sight and Dave came back to life, his face quickly reddening at the close proximity.

“SO…” Karkat cleared his throat, “ARE YOU DONE WITH MY MAKE-UP?” 

“Uh, yeah, I think that should about cover it. Sorry it’s pretty hard to see with my shades on so I had to get closer.” Dave gave a nervous smile and continued, “Your turn master artist. Make me into a work of art.” The boy’s fingers grasped his shades and removed them, his eyes already closed against the bright lights. 

“YOU’RE A WORK OF SOMETHING THAT’S FOR SURE.” Karkat laughed and began to fiddle with the plastic cases. He opened what looked like foundation and began to put it on Dave’s face a little roughly.

“Ouch dude you’re gonna rub my skin off that way. Here, do it gently.” He grabbed the troll’s hand and showed him how to do it without making him look like he was from a horror show. His hand lingered when he was done and he released a small sigh. “That’s a lot better. You’re getting the hang of it bro. You’re doing great.”

“I APPRECIATE THE SUPPORT, BUT YOU’RE MAKING THIS MORE DIFFICULT SO SHUT THE HELL UP.”

“Make me.” Dave wiggled his eyebrows at Karkat and let a wide grin fill his face.

“I WILL MAKE YOU LOOK LIKE A CLOWN IF YOU DO NOT SHUT YOUR MOUTH NOW.”

“Okay fine.” The response came in a huff and Dave slouched slightly in mock disappointment. 

Karkat continued, repeating what he felt Dave had done for his make-up. His hand fell on the human’s thigh so he could help push himself up slightly more to the taller boy’s level. Eventually he reached the lips and decided on bright red, applying it quickly, but as neatly as he could, fearing he would do something he regretted if he lingered to long. He doubted he would be able to control himself if he got too close. It was so tempting to do it regardless. Dave’s eyes were already closed and his lips were slightly parted and his hair was messed up were Karkat’s hands had invaded to reach the full forehead and he looked so calm and beautiful that Karkat couldn’t help but stare for a moment. 

Dave’s eyes slowly opened, revealing a blushing Vantas with a slack jaw. “Hey how is the partners in crime thing gonna work if you freeze at my beauty too?”

“I’M NOT FROZEN BY ANY BEAUTY YOU IGNORANT ASSWIPE. I’M JUST CONCERNED BECAUSE YOU LOOK LIKE HELL. MY MAKE-UP SKILLS ARE SHIT, I’M SORRY.”

“I won’t blame you for it. At least not this time. Not all of us can be masters of the arts ya know.” Karkat flashed him a glare. “ Movie time?” 

“SURE. HERE YOU PUT IT IN. I’M FIXING THE TEMPERATURE, IT FEELS LIKE YOUR PLANET IN HERE.” Karkat grabbed the case and shoved it into his friend’s hands before sliding off of the blankets on Dave’s bed. His gray arms reached into the air and his back arched, releasing a light popping noise. His sweater rode up slightly, revealing the top of his hip bone to Dave. The human felt his chest freeze momentarily at the sight. 

“You could just take off your sweater. I got some cooler shirts you can wear, in both senses of the word. Or you could go shirtless, I don’t really care.” Dave shrugged and begged any god that might hear him to convince Karkat to go with the latter suggestion. 

“GIVE ME ONE OF YOUR PUTRID SHIRTS.” Damn. Strider stood and grabbed a short sleeve shirt from an open drawer and tossed it to him. It had the word ‘SWAG’ in large white letters on bright red cotton. “ARE YOU SHITTING ME. YOU SERIOUSLY HAVE ONE OF THESE SHIRTS?”

“Irony.”

“YES, HELLO OPERATOR I’D LIKE TO CALL BULLSHIT.” 

“Just get changed bro. We have a movie to watch and I’m actually going to try to understand it.”

“OKAY. FINE. IS IT OKAY IF I CHANGE HERE?”

“Yeah, just hurry up man.” Yes. God yes this was acceptable as well. Dave glanced out of the corner of his eye at the rustle of fabric and held his breath. Karkat’s chest had the slightest hint of muscle, just a little clue of his past workouts. He was a bit chubby now and overall, Dave found he could not look away until his shirt covered the sight. 

“SEE SOMETHING YOU LIKE?”

“No, I’m just concerned about your lack of a belly button.” Dave mentally high fived himself for his save.

“WHAT IN THE DOUCHE-NOZZLING FUCK IS A BELLY BUTTON?”

“Uhh, this thing.” Dave lifted his shirt tentatively and pointed at his own. “So yeah you don’t have one and I was surprised even though it makes total sense because you aren’t even a mammal or anything. Like it would make less sense if you did have one really like yo why the fuck do you got that, that shit makes no sense. Anyways…” He stood and put the movie in his laptop and settled onto his bed, draping blankets around his shoulders. “Ready?”

“JUST A MOMENT.” Karkat positioned himself a few centimeters from Dave and used his blanket to cover his shoulders as well. 

The movie played, it was pretty typical and although Dave was determined to watch it in order to discuss it later (he was being so disgustingly kind) Karkat found himself falling asleep, his head slowly drooping down to Dave’s shoulder. Dave rested his own head on Karkat’s and let his hand begin to search for Karkat’s, like they had done before during these quiet moments. But Dave’s hand only found Karkat’s thigh. He froze there, not wanting to move and possibly spoil the moment, but not wanting to make his friend uncomfortable. That was until Karkat’s missing hand found itself on Dave’s thigh. Their breaths were silent as they both contemplated what to do next, if anything. Dave’s thumb began to move of its own accord and rubbed gentle circles into Karkat’s leg. The troll shifted his body so that he was on his side leaning against Dave and led the human’s hand to a comfortable spot on his thigh and buried his face in the albino’s neck. Dave felt his heart speed up considerably and released a small sigh before relaxing his tense muscles. 

The movie ended with a romantic wedding on a beach, fireworks blasting in hazes of color in the background, and ‘The End’ in swirling gold letters. Karkat moved his face towards the screen and yawned before moving away from his source of warmth. His lips smacked groggily as he tried to bring himself back to the world of the fully conscious. Dave’s hand fell from Karkat’s thigh and the human used the moment to awkwardly scratch at the back of his head. 

“SO, WHAT’S NEXT FOR THIS HUMAN SLEEPOVER RITUAL?”

“Pillow fights, gossip, and I don’t fuckin know man. What do girls do when they hang out in the masses? Go shopping? Summon satan? Who the fuck knows honestly. What about troll girls? Don’t they have stereotypical sleepover times?” 

“I GUESS THEY SORT OF DO-“

“Hold up Vantas. I just remembered a couple integral things about sleepovers and I am so disappointed I didn’t think of this earlier.”

“WELL, WHAT THE HELL HAS YOUR THINKPAN REMEMBERED?”

“Two things: pranking and truth or dare. Those are like THE greatest parts of sleepovers oh my god how could I forget I am so ashamed of myself right now.”

“UH, EXCUSE ME, FROM ANOTHER PLANET HERE. CARE TO EXPLAIN WHAT IN THIS GOD-FORSAKEN UNIVERSE IS TRUTH OR DARE?”

“It’s a game. You take turns and shit and ask the other person ‘truth or dare’ and they pick one and then you either ask them a question they have to answer or dare them to do something.”

“THAT SOUNDS HUMILIATING, WHY WOULD ANYONE EVER DO THAT?”

“Cause that’s the point. Like just getting your friends to do or admit to the dumbest things you can think of.”

“WHY FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING WOULD YOU FUCKING SUBMIT YOURSELF TO THAT?”

“It’s called FUN Mr. Stick Up My Ass.” 

“EXCUSE ME FOR NOT UNDERSTANDING THE UTTER STUPIDITY OF THE HUMAN RACE AND THIS SO CALLED CONCEPT OF ‘FUN’.”

“So you wanna play or not bro?”

“MAYBE LATER. I COULD STAND TO SMACK YOU IN THE FACE WITH A PILLOW RIGHT NOW THOUGH.”

“Why Mr. Vantas! Such bold black flirting! I am astonished at your behavior! Never would I have imagined that you would say such dirty things to such a virgin as myself. Why I am just sho-“ Dave’s impeccable southern belle routine was cut short by a cloth bag of feathers to his face. 

“TOLD YOU SO.”

“You little fucker! Bro you are so going down.” He laughed in Karkat’s face and his fingers gripped at a pillow beside him. With a sound ‘whomp’ he introduced his weapon to the trolls arm. Karkat stood and attempted to pelt Dave with his own hits. Excited, the human stood on his bed and assaulted his component in a flurry of white cloth. From his vantage point, Dave was able to lean forward enough to deliver a blow that knocked the troll down onto the concrete floor. However, Dave soon followed after, losing his balance after the force put into the final blow. He landed by Karkat’s feet with a thud and felt his body erupt in laughter. His thin frame shook heartily and he wiped an imaginary tear from his eye as he up-righted himself. After a moment, the other boy sat up as well and let loose a mix of giggles and snorts, causing Dave to start all over again. 

“Told you so.” The human managed to choke out between chuckles. His face reddened with the exertion and he clutched at his sides as he howled and let himself fall onto Karkat.

“OH FUCK OFF YOU NOOKSTAIN.” The troll spewed, but his words were light and he shoved at Dave playfully. In retaliation, Dave pushed back harder. They continued this cycle for a moment before the white haired human latched onto the material of Karkat’s shirt and rolled them around. Their chests pressed together and still shook with laughter. 

Finally opening his eyes, Karkat found himself positioned on top of Dave and flushed lightly. Dave continued to chuckle lightly, his eyes still closed, and his fingers stroked Karkat’s arms until he found his hands. Interlacing the digits with a sigh, he allowed himself a content smile and opened his eyes to see Karkat looking anywhere but his gaze. 

“You’re actually kind of beautiful sometimes, ya know that Vantas?” His voice was barely above a whisper, but he felt Karkat shift his face so it was hidden by his chest. “Probably just my mad make-up skills tho.”

With that the trolls head snapped back up and he looked his best friend straight in the eye. “AS FUCKING IF.” But his face still burned with the compliment. 

“So… you uh… you comfortable there?”

“HMM. I THINK RIGHT NOW MIGHT BE THE PERFECT TIME TO CATCH UP ON SOME SLEEP. GUESS I WON’T BE ABLE TO MOVE FOR AT LEAST 3 DAYS.”

“Dude, bro, as much as I’m enjoying this, no homo by the way, my legs are falling asleep.”

“UGH FINE YOU IGNORMAUS ASSHOLE. I’LL GET OFF YOU AND GET FAR AWAY FROM YOU AND YOUR ENDLESS REMINDER OF NO HOMO.” 

“Thank you man. No homo.”

“HOW DOES THAT EVEN INSINUATE HOMOSEXUAL ACTIVITIES?”

“Idk man, no homo though.”

“DAVE.”

“What? No homo”

“FUCKING.”

“Watch your language dude. No homo.”

“STRIDER!” Karkat spit the name out angrily, releasing a small spew of saliva.

“What is it my main man? My best bro? What can a guy do for his pal? No homo.”

“I’M GOING TO ‘NO HOMO’ YOU IF YOU DON’T FUCKING STOP RIGHT NOW!”

“How would one do that exactly? By the way-” 

“NO FUCKING HOMO! I GET IT ALREADY. JESUS CHRIST STRIDER, THINK I CAN’T TAKE A HINT?” Karkat moved off of Dave, standing up and waving his arms angrily. 

“So, truth or dare?”

“WHAT IN THE FUCK NOW?”

“Sleepover shenanigans man. Gotta keep this train on the tracks. It’s not doing so great so far, gotta admit. So truth or dare?”

“YOU ARE A FUCKING I DON’T EVEN KNOW THERE ISN’T A WORD TO DESCRIBE YOU ANYMORE. CONGRATULATIONS YOU HAVE GRADUATED FROM THE COLLEGE OF BEING AN ALOOF ASSHOLE INTO THE REAL WORLD OF ULTIMATE DOUCHEBAGGERY. ALSO I CHOOSE TRUTH.” Karkat settled onto the bed and awaited his question.

“Okay. We’ll start out simple. Who is your favorite actor?”

“TROLL WILL SMITH, DUH.”

“Great, now you ask me truth or dare.”

“TRUTH OR DARE?”

“Ennie meenie minie truth.”

“OKAY… DAMN. WHY IS YOUR HAIR WHITE?”

“I’m an anime protagonist.” Dave flashed his companion a quick smile. “Nah, actually I’m albino. I was born with it. Or maybe its Maybelline. You never know.”

“YOU ARE A GOD DAMNED LIAR.”

“Hey, I can’t be perfect can I? Truth or dare?”

“WILL I REGRET CHOOSING DARE?”

“Dare it is then.”

“I SWEAR IF YOU DARE ME TO DO SOMETHING STUPID…”

“Awesome. I dare you to do a somersault. You just roll on the ground. It’s sort of like a flip. Here I’ll show you.” Dave rolled backwards and landed in a seated position. 

“OKAY. I GUESS I CAN DO THAT…” Karkat began to lean backwards on the bed and made it to where his legs were over his head, his body now trapped in the small crevice between the bed and wall. “GOD FUCKING DAMMIT!” 

“Dude this is amazing.” Dave shook his head at his friend’s misfortune and took the moment to appreciate the full view of Karkat’s delightful booty. “Here, let me help you.”

“NO! I’M GOING TO FINISH THIS PATHETIC EXCUSE FOR A DARE ON MY OWN.”

“I sure do like a man who can fend for himself.”

“BULGEMUNCHER.” He attempted to lean against the wall to complete his somersault and managed to sink lower into the gap. 

“You’re just making it worse. You can just lean back forward and try again on the floor or something. Let me help you dude. That’s what friends are for, right? Helping you get out of a bad place when you very obviously can’t on your own.”

“YOUR PLATONIC RAMBLINGS ARE JUST DELIGHTFUL. BUT I CAN DO THIS.”

“You’re going to break something, just let me help a little bit.”

“YOU BETTER PICK DARE.”

“Okay, I’ll pick dare. Here grab my hands.” Karkat reached out and did so and Dave pulled him forward with little effort. Dave could feel a huff of air come from Karkat, their faces were mere inches apart. He leaned in slightly and connected their foreheads, then bit his lip in anticipation. Their eyes shifted to meet the other’s gaze and they paused.

“I DARE YOU TO…” Dave began to close the remaining distance, but halted when he noticed the apprehension filling the troll’s features.

“Dare me to what?” His breath was warm on Karkat’s lips.

“I DARE YOU TO GO STEAL AS MANY SNACKS AS YOU CAN FROM THE NUTRITION BLOCK.” Dave pulled back sharply, confusion evident in his furrowed brow. “WHAT? I’M HUNGRY AND THIS IS AN EASY SOLUTION.”

“Damn, okay. You want anything in particular?” ‘Like my dick’ he added silently. 

“I COULD USE SOME WATER. NOW GET TO IT STRIDER.” 

“I will. Once you do your somersault properly.” That earned him an annoyed glance, but the troll shuffled away from him and completed a roll on the cold floor. “Not bad, Vantas. Okay, well I’ll be right back. Don’t wait up for me babe.”

“DIDN’T PLAN ON IT. THANKS, DAVE.”

He gave a thumbs up and followed the corridors to the kitchen, where Kanaya was scraping something onto a plate.

“Hello, David. Your make up is quite… unique. Who did it?” She glanced over her shoulder at you and raised her eyebrows minutely. 

“Karkat. I’m teaching him about sleepovers. It’s going pretty well so far.”

“Are you going to tell him about your less than heterosexual leanings towards his person?”

“Nah, why you and Rose gotta be like that? We’re just two bros who like to test the no homo boundary constantly for ironic purposes.”

“David…”

“I don’t have the courage. Or the words. If I try I’m just going to end up with a whole lot of word vomit and a lot less of a best friend.” 

“I see. What are you doing now?”

“Getting him food for a dare. It’s not the most exciting dare, but the dude’s learning so I’ll let it pass.”

“I assume it’s truth or dare? You do realize you could get him to confess to you first.”

“I don’t want to force him to do something he doesn’t want to do. I’m not the best guy, but I’m not that much of an obnoxious douche. At least I hope not. Anyways I’d probably fuck that up. Like I do everything with him. I almost kissed him not 5 minutes ago and he nope-d the fuck out of that. I know you’ve told me you think it’s mutual… I don’t see it though. It sucks. All I’ve done is piss him off and make him feel uncomfortable.”

“Just bring him whatever food he requested and let him lead the sleepover for a while.” 

“I guess I’ll do that then. Thanks Maryam. Tell Rose I’ll give the make-up back tomorrow.”

She smiles and leaves with her steaming plate of whatever the fuck that was. Dave releases a deep sigh and gathers a multitude of snacks and a bottle of water before turning on his heel. When he reaches the door to his room, he hears music playing softly. Knocking the door open with his foot, he glances inside to see Karkat laying on his bed lost in thought.

“Hey babe, did you miss me?” Karkat jumps and curses, twisting his head to see Dave fighting back a laugh. 

“DAMMIT STRIDER. GET THE FUCK OVER HERE WITH THE LOOT ALREADY.” He does so and releases it from his arms carelessly, the sound of plastic squishing fills the air for a quick moment. Karkat tosses the bag of Doritos at his face and twists open the cap on the water, taking several deep gulps before setting it aside.

“SIT DOWN, PLEASE.”

“Oh fuck, what did I do?”

“NOTHING… IT’S JUST. I’VE BEEN THINKING AND…”

“You know how to do that?”

“DAVE, PLEASE. THIS ISN’T EASY.”

“Then don’t do it.”

“I NEED TO. I CAN’T JUST KEEP GOING ON LIKE THIS.”

“Karkat, I’m begging you just not right now, okay? Let’s just enjoy tonight as best bros and laugh at all the silly shit we’re gonna do. You can even pick what we do next. Just not this. Please.” Dave searched his eyes, begging silently. 

“IT’S GOING TO HAVE TO BE ADDRESSED AT SOME POINT OR ANOTHER. PROMISE ME WE WILL.”

“Fine, I promise. So what now?”

“HOW ABOUT SLEEPING? I’M EXHAUSTED OVER HERE.”

“Are you sure there isn’t something else like a game you want to play?”

“DAVE IF YOU AREN’T LAYING DOWN IN 5 SECONDS I WILL CULL YOU. IF WE AREN’T GOING TO TALK THEN WE’RE SLEEPING.”

“Why though.”

“CAUSE YOU SAID I CHOOSE WHAT WE DO NEXT. THIS IS MY CHOICE.”

“Ergh. Fine. Move over a bit.”

“NAH, I DON’T FEEL LIKE MOVING. I’M ACTUALLY VERY COMFORTABLE WHERE I’M AT RIGHT NOW.”

“How am I supposed to lay down then?”

“STRIDER, WE BOTH KNOW YOU HAVE A THINKPAN. USE IT. OR WHATEVER IS LEFT OF IT AT LEAST.”

“You are literally sprawled across my entire bed. Unless you want me sleeping on you, I suggest you scootch over.” Karkat pauses for a moment and gauges his face before speaking.

“WHO SAYS I DON’T? I CERTAINLY HAVEN’T HEARD ANYONE SAY THAT. NOW LAY DOWN YOU TOASTED WAFFLE.” Stunned, Dave merely blinks in response.

“5.” Karkat sends Dave a warning glare. “4.” Dave starts to move towards him. He sits on the white covers and hesitates. “3.” He casts his eyes to the side and lays down, his body against Karkat’s. The troll sighs and wraps an arm around him. “THANK YOU DAVE.” He runs his fingers through the white hair in front of him gently. Dave relaxes into him and lets his eyes shut. Karkat threads his arm under Dave’s and wraps it around his stomach. 

~Hours Later~

 

Dave is the first one to awake with a yawn. He hums at the warmth at his back and pushes into the heat more. Eventually his eyes open and he glances at the source behind him, eyes widening at the realization. He begins to recall what happened and lets a heartbroken look cross over his face. Dave shifts slightly and suddenly Karkat is curling into him, lacing his legs in between Dave’s own. He sets his chin on Dave’s shoulder and yawns, his sharp teeth glinting in the florescent lights. 

“Morning handsome.” Karkat greets Dave quietly, still half asleep. “Where’s my morning smooch babe?” He nuzzles into Dave’s neck fondly.

“Karkat, I don’t think you’re fully awake yet so I am just going to ignore everything you say until you are.” Dave spews the sentence out quickly.

“But baaaaabe, don’t you wanna give me a kiss? My lips are ready and all puckered up, just for you.” Karkat’s fingers run up and down Dave’s side, sending chills down the human’s spine and causing him to tense. “C’mon. Don’t you want to kiss me?”

“Yeah…” It’s light and breathy and Dave is surprised when Karkat replies.

“Then why don’t you?” His words are slightly slurred by sleep, but he seems awake enough to torment Dave. 

“Why don’t you kiss me instead?” Dave turns his head towards Karkat and finds his eyes still closed. 

“Babe just do it. Please. I want to taste you.” Karkat licks his lip and Dave purses his mouth as he tries to ignore the small throbbing starting in his abdomen. “Kiss me.” Although feeling horribly guilty and ashamed as he does, Dave obliges and plants a feathery light kiss to Karkat’s lips. The troll smiles and nuzzles back into the shocked human. He seizes up internally because holy hell he just kissed his best friend who he has been in love with for a year now at said friend’s request. A smile sneaks onto his face and he settles back in for another round of sleeping.

~Hours later~

 

“Hey Dave… what happened earlier?”

“Huh?”

“I remember waking up for a few minutes and you were awake too. I can’t remember what happened though. It’s just really fuzzy in my mind.”

“Oh. About that.”

“I’m just curious. Cause I feel like something happened and I don’t know if it was just from a dream or what.”

“Uhh, yeah. You called me babe and asked me to kiss you?”

“What the fuck? Sorry you had to deal with that.”

“It’s okay.”

“How did you deal with it?”

“I wanna go back to sleep now.”

“Dave.”

“Bro.”

“Dave, how did you deal with it?”

“Fuck.”

“I’m waiting.”

“You really don’t remember?”

“Would I be asking if I did? I just want to know what you did to deal with my grotesquely affectionate unconscious body.”

“I did what you asked. I kissed you, are you happy now?”

“You’ve gotta be shitting me. You actually kissed me?” Karkat’s eyes widened in disbelief.

“Barely, but yeah that’s what I’ve been trying to tell you and I might need you to get off me because well cats out of the bag and hey the mayor could probably use some help at Can Town right about now.”

“Wait, don’t you dare go anywhere.’’ Karkat sat up and tried to clear his head, his heart now racing in embarrassment and the hope that he could still… “Okay I’m more awake. Now answer me this one question.” His voice was still a bit groggy, but his eyes were wide and alert. “Why did you kiss me? Honestly?”

“I really should go see what the mayor is up too. He could get himself into some trouble or something I should make sure he’s doing okay.” Dave’s voice cracked in his rambling and his eyes were completely open and were filled with fear like he was a frightened animal, trapped and cornered. 

“Dave please don’t look at me like that. Fuck, I didn’t mean to scare you into anything; you can leave if you want I understand.”

“No you deserve an answer. You’re just. God Karkat you’re so amazing and stunning and smart and so secretly sweet and kind and oh my god you’re the most incredible and most attractive person I’ve ever met and you also have a really nice ass and I just want to listen to you talk forever cause your voice is as perfect as the rest of you and wow I am so not straight and I don’t really do quadrants but I just want to take care of you and be with you and I’m pretty sure I’m in love with you or some shit and please say something I’m a little scared right now and you know that’s hard for me to admit and oh my god stop being so cute stop blushing dammit Karkat I’m trying to keep any amount of self-control I have left and you are not helping. Also I’m going to shut up now.”

“I’m a little confused.” Karkat looked at his hands silently. 

“About what?” Dave gulped loudly, trying to force his heart to stay in its chest.

“Why aren’t you kissing me yet?” Their eyes met.

“A-are you sure you want me too?” Karkat leaned in until there was about an inch left and felt the other’s breath tickle his face.

“What do you think?” Dave gripped both sides of Karkat’s face and closed the space between them. Their lips pressed against each other tentatively at first, but it started to deepen when Karkat relocated his legs on to either side of Dave’s. He locked his fingers into the white hair and pressed into the human while Dave placed one hand on the back of Karkat’s head and the other in between his shoulder blades on his back. It was wet and sloppy, but they kept at it until they were forced to part with heavy breaths, their lungs desperate for oxygen. Karkat fell to his side with a sigh.

“I think I’m actually seeing stars right now.” Dave’s voice was small as he forced his gaze onto his partner’s. Both boys lips rose slightly and their foreheads came together.

“Can we do that again?” Karkat whispered lightly, asking permission with a smile that reached his eyes. Their fingers intertwined. 

“Oh god yes. No homo.”

“Are you shitting me?”

“Full bi.”

“You’re a fucking nerd you know that?”

“Whatever you say Karkat.”

“Dave?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m pretty sure I’m in love with you or some shit too.”

“That’s plagiarism.”

“Asshole.”

“Yeah.”


End file.
